So, things are a bit crazy around here...and my blog is terribly behind and will probably be that way for a while. After much thinking/debating, etc, I decided to check into a few part time teaching jobs. I've been doing all sorts of odds and end things like tutoring, babysitting, subbing and they were all just making me crazy with the lack of schedule/routine and I didn't feel like I could devote the right time to my kids. We need the money because Josh hasn't received raises for the last two years (I am grateful he has a job though). So given all that, I emailed a principal at a school where Josh's co-worker's wife works...if that makes sense. Anyway, I sent her an email asking her if she had or knew of any part time teaching jobs. A few days later, I got an email from her saying they would like to interview me for a part time 5th grade job...perfect...I already taught 5th grade for two years. They knew they wanted me, so I jumped through the hoops backwards and applied to the district. It all went through flawlessly and so easily, so here I am with a teaching job...I am very grateful for that, especially given the current economy. Here's the way it works...I teach every Monday and Wednesday and every other Friday...my job share partner teaches on my off days. It's a great set up because I only have to get to work 2-3 days a week. It is also year round, which means I have already started, but that also means I get three weeks off in September, December, March and June...that is awesome! It is at Daybreak Elementary for those of you that know where Daybreak is. It's really the most ideal situation for me right now... Even though it's "Part time" with teaching you put in way more than that, especially with a job share...it's a lot harder/trickier than teaching on your own...but it's good. The teacher I am job sharing with is awesome...I really like working with her (even though I rarely see her...we talk a lot though!).
However, I am also feeling guilty about it all. People have asked me things like "Why are you doing that?" or "What happened," etc...I don't know why, but that kind of gets to me. I feel bad that my kids have to have babysitters a lot. My house is terribly behind because I can't fit everything I need to into a day and devote time to my kids as well...something has to go, so I guess it's my house right now...whether I like it or not. I do know that we'll fall into a routine and it will get easier. My kids only have me gone 85 days out of the year, and not all of those days require them going to a sitter. The sitter we have is fabulous, so that is a plus. I also know that a lot of moms do this and work full time...so I know it will get better, but it's a bit overwhelming. I guess I just want to be a good mom, wife, Latter-Day Saint and teacher...and right now I am trying to figure out how to do all of that...but it's good and I do love teaching, which helps! Anyway sorry for that big long post, I usually try to keep them more upbeat...but I just needed to write this all down and this also explains my absence from the blogging world!
7 years ago
4 comments:
Oh Sarah, no need to explain yourself! You are amazing and just because you work a little does not mean that you don't love your kids. Sacrifice in the family is part of learning, loving, and growing. I work, my photography and other paid services take me away from my kids. I used to feel really bad popping in a movie for Mia during nap time. I realized that she is getting everything needed, is not delayed (heaven sake she is starting to read now at age 3), and also needs her time away from me. You love teaching, the skills you will bring home are amazing. Geesh, I think you should never be ashamed of necessary decision. Go! Live! Bring home a piece of bacon, so you can spend it on pretty fabric...for Kenna of course. Oh, and so you can come visit your parents, aka me.
I seriously wrote this post about a month or so ago. I'm headed back to school this fall and work part time and have had a complex about leaving my kids. I've gotten some weird and not so nice comments, have had a few crying sessions, but in the end am realizing what I am doing will benefit my family.
You are doing what you need to to help your family. Your kids are loved and cared for, and you are an amazing woman. Plus, it never hurts to have marketable skills. I have a friend who recently lost her husband and is finding herself in a tough situation because the jobs she can work at, she doesn't make very much. Be proud that you have an education and can use it to enrich others lives and the lives of your family as well. It will all work out. (HUGS) and good luck starting the school year, you will be GREAT!
congrats on your teaching job! You'll do great!!
Sarah - dear, You are amazing! I miss teaching and have often thought of opening a preschool numerous times, just so that I could teach, use the boxes and boxes of stuff in the garage and also to feel like I have a life, to make a difference. Your kids will be fine and maybe even better because you will have the rewards of both teaching AND being a mother. Good Luck!
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